Tophe

I busted my first ever thief today. It was only a girl, no older than seven, but still. I risked myself for the greater good, and the end result was JUSTICE! I'm like the Jack Bauer of Magnet Mart, Gungahlin.

However, in hindsight I realise I should have approached my apprehension a little bit more appropriately.

The little brat was trying to sneak some impulse purchase Christmas earrings from my counter; and she went about it by standing as close to the counter as possible, and "playing" with the earrings. I watched out of the corner of my eye as she closed her tiny, thieving fist around a pair of the earrings, and slid it down the side of her body and then up inside her dress (where from there? I don't want to know). I kept looking to the mother to notice her kleptomaniac, destined-to-become-a-homeless-prostitute-junkie daughter, but there was no reaction that I could discern, so I had no choice but to go in myself.

I took a deep breath, considered the right level of force (for the daughter's sake), diplomacy (for the mother's sake), tact (for the company's sake), and bluster (for my own sake) - and what did I come out with?

"Hey, little girl - it'll be two dollars for what's under your dress!"



Shit.